The Contest

Cari came downstairs with the box of Christmas lights. Nothing Earth shattering. Just a few strands of lights. This was always sufficient when we lived in Florida. A string of lights across the roof line, a few lights in the trees close to the house. In our neighborhood there, that's what almost everybody did. Sure, we had the random nut who decided to spend what I make in a year, on that months electric bill, but we fit in with most of the decorators.
In our new neighborhood, this box looks very insignificant. The house across the street had a jump on everyone. They must have worked through the night, because when I woke up, every window had a wreath, the porch railing had garland, and lights suddenly appeared on every gutter.

Our neighbors are all very friendly. But the guy across the street started a silent competition. The house around the corner was next. He has two lots. Every tree has lights of a different color. He also added those light up deer, I think I counted four or five. The house facing the road, just before you turn onto our block, was next. He used about twenty strings of lights on his front porch. Just continuously wrapping them around the railing. During the day it looks like a birds nest of wires. At night, a glow that lights the sky. He also added a giant cross that says "merry Christmas".

We put up our string of lights across the gutters. That was fun for me. I just love getting up on the extension ladder, and balancing with one arm as I clip lights to the gutters. (I hope you read a lot of sarcasm in that last sentence). We hung up a white, wooden, angel that lights up on the porch. We were out of lights. We plugged it in and ran to the street to check out our creation. Cute. Then the guy across the street plugged in his creation. I was embarrassed. I might as well just unplug mine and pretend I didn't even try.
But I must try.
Cari and I ran over to Lowe's for some more lights. While there we picked up some garland and about a dozen red bows. We live in a small town, but this is ridiculous. Who else was at Lowe's? The guy from across the street. We made some small talk with him. Turns out he was buying more lights also. I'm just trying to keep up here, this guy is trying to out spend me.

Back at the house, Cari wrapped the porch railing in garland and hung the red bows. I climbed into the tree at the end of the driveway and started weaving lights.
Cari said I was going to have to climb onto the roof and put some lights near the windows on the second story. HA! The pitch on that roof must be more than 45 degrees! I told her I wasn't going to do it, based on my desire to live. She agreed to let it slide. . .Only if the neighbors don't string lights on their second story. Two days later, the guy next door was out climbing on his roof. "YOU ARE A MORON!", I screamed in my head as I was waving to him.
With the porch done and my tree lighted, we are starting to fit in. Next year we will add some deer of our own. Watch out neighbors, you started a contest with a very competitive couple. We don't lose!