Friday, July 31, 2009

Transformed

After I had finished cutting grass on Thursday morning I noticed an area with a few yellow jackets buzzing around. I wandered over to investigate, hoping to find and destroy their home. What caught my eye was one yellow jacket still squirming while trapped in a spider web. The spider ran down the web and started to beat the tar out of that yellow jacket.

They were both moving at a frantic pace as the winged insect started to get covered in sticky web. I ran inside and grabbed my camera and flash. With the flash set on the ground and aimed up at the fight, I started shooting.
These last two shots were taken from the other side of the web, facing the yellow jacket bent in half. Once the victim seemed secure, the spider retreated to a corner and waited for his prey to stop moving.
After a few moments, the spider came back and tied up his dinner a bit more before pulling him up to the top of the web. The entire process took less than five minutes and it was interesting to watch the spider in action.

What I saw on Thursday was yellow jacket being transformed into spider.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Shaved

Contrary to popular belief, I do not like being late to work. For a period of time last year, I couldn't get to work without being at least five minutes late.

In the past month, I have been MUCH better and one day I was even five minutes EARLY. Seriously!

When I left for work on Monday morning, I was on track to be five minutes early. I avoided the snooze button and was on my game all morning. I even shaved quickly while in the shower. Nothing was going to stop me from being the hero at work.

About five minutes into my drive I caught a glimpse of myself in the rear view mirror and started my happy morning came to a screeching hault. I had shaved a bit too quickly in the shower, after having not shaved for the past three days. What remained on my face were two big patches of hair. One on my cheek and one on my chin. I had to turn around.

Driving back to the house put me even on time, and the five minutes it took me to shave and get back into the car put me at five over. I really don't like being late. I just don't allow time for errors.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Critical

I know most, if not all, of you don't watch Formula 1 racing, but you may have heard about the accident during this past weekends qualifying.
This crash may not have been the most spectacular crash to watch visually, but it is one of the more serious crashes I have seen in years.

Pray for Massa and his family that he recovers well from this accident.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Family Movie Night

Cari chose Monty Python: The Meaning of Life for an evening movie.
I had seen most of this movie long ago and questioned if the kids should watch this. She said, "It's Monty Python, how bad can it be?"

I pointed out its 'R' rating as I put it in the DVD player and we all sat down.

Near the beginning is a song by a Catholic talking about not using birth control.
Every Sperm is Sacred.




Ok. I looked over at Cari during that song and asked if she was ready to turn it off. We let it play through, hoping the sexual theme would end.

At the beginning of this next scene I remembered what happened and asked Cari if she knew what was coming up. She did not.





At about 4 minutes and thirty seconds into that scene Cari jumped up to cover a child's eyes and I stopped the movie.

I reminded Cari that I didn't think it would be a great family movie and she blamed me for not providing enough information on HOW bad it was going to get.

Meanwhile the kids wanted to watch the rest . . . which they would not do.
Next week, the kids pick the movie.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Christmas in July!

There's a lot of things I would like to buy right now, but I don't have the money. So I started wondering what Santa might be up to these days. Part of me is afraid that he feels lonely or bored. The other part of me thinks he wouldn't want to be bothered with us during the summer. That lead me to creating a new holiday. Having a separate Christmas in late July would be great and could give a huge boost to the economy.

Right now, Obama could start touring the country as black Santa and giving people a new holiday to celebrate. Obviously this will be a made up holiday to support retailers. There won't be any religious event connected to it for people to ignore. There also won't be any historical point behind it.

The idea is that when people buy stuff, they feel happier. That happiness only lasts a short time before reality starts to hit again. Think about it, you have made it through Christmas in December, and you have a great feeling all through Spring. Your spirits are high as you approach the fourth of July, and then your world collapses as you awaken on July fifth.

The government shouldn't allow you to live in the slump that takes you through the end of the summer. The government should give you a reason to go out and spend money you don't have. The government should make you happy.

Christmas 2 will feature a black Santa from the South Pole instead of the bearded white Santa. White Santa has plenty to do getting ready for Christmas 1, you know, the one about Jesus. Don't worry, black Santa won't be breaking into your house to see what you bought, he is just a marketing icon.

This year, for Christmas 2, I would like a kayak, Madden 10 for the Wii, a light weight, single man tent, a proper backpack for overnight hikes, and a Curta calculator. Don't worry, I'm not spoiling Christmas 1, my shopping list continues on for several more pages. I just don't want to have to text that much stuff over to black Santa when I can just fax my list as-is to the North Pole.

Obama will probably want to thank me for fixing the economy with this new holiday, but I'd rather just have more presents.
Oh! I can't wait to wake up on July 28th and start my Christmas 2 shopping spree!
What will you buy?

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

WWE SMACKDOWN!

On Sunday the kids and I headed into Greenville to see some WWE wrestling. The three of us have started to watch wrestling over the past couple of weeks and they already have favorite wrestlers to watch and cheer for. When a commercial came on one night saying that they were coming to Greenville how I could I say no? Cari almost said no when she saw how much three tickets cost, but we went anyway.

We found out their favorite, Jeff Hardy, was going to be in the show so that added a whole new level of excitement. When we got there one of the ushers told me I wasn't allowed to bring my camera in because it was too nice. I suppose they are afraid I'll make my own posters or something. He said any camera with detachable lenses are not allowed. I didn't argue and I went to check my camera in at the desk.

I won't bore you with the blow by blow replay but let me tell you about the atmosphere of big show wrestling. WWE puts on a GREAT show. You have to go with the mindset that you are going to be a part of it. You have to shout for the good guys, boo the bad guys, and count the fallen guy out to three with the ref. That's part of the fun.

The lights go down and the music starts playing before a wrestler enters the arena. Every wrestler has his / her (yeah, we saw girls wrestle too) own theme song, so the kids knew exactly who was coming out based on the first few notes. When a popular wrestler entered the ring, the entire place would go crazy. There was TONS of energy in this place.

As a guy got pinned and the ref started counting to three with slaps to the mat, the whole crowd would get into it. "ONE!" "TWO!" Then the pinned guy would kick out of it and get back up and the crowd would moan. It was like you were telling the other guy, "You almost had him."

Meredith had a notepad and she was making mini posters through the evening to hold up and she came face to face with Jeff Hardy at the end of the night. She was against the gate where he walked by to leave the arena.

The other cool thing was to see the wrestlers that you watch on tv every week up close. Even if you never watch wrestling, I had NEVER watched it until about a month ago, going to see them live is something great.

The WWE is World Wrestling Entertainment and they definatly know how to put on a great show.


Monday, July 20, 2009

Your Mop Stinks

please use a clean mop!

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Saturday, July 18, 2009

5 second rule x2

Everyone knows the five second rule. But I need clarification.

I was eating some Fritos last night and I dropped one as I tried to get it into my mouth. -- Yeah, I'm not sure how I missed, but I did.

I quickly grabbed it up off the floor before the dog could get to it. I turned it over in my hand while I did a quick inspection for random debre. It seemed clean enough and had only been on the floor for two seconds.

I went to pop it in my mouth again and failed. The same chip hit the ground once more. I quickly scooped it up and noticed my kids looking at me. They were watching to see if I would eat it. I became some sort of entertainment for them.
I scrunched up my eyes, confused by their stares. "It's the five second rule", I said.

Doesn't the five seconds start over each time you drop it?

Thursday, July 16, 2009

48 Degrees

We drove up to visit Sliding Rock in the Pisgah National Forest on Tuesday afternoon. It was hot outside and I figured the cold water would be good.

When we arrived, it was immediately obvious that the air in the mountains is much cooler than the air at home. Suddenly, the 48 degree water of the falls didn't sound as refreshing. Now it just sounded COLD.

There was a line at Sliding Rock that went through the creek and up the side of the rock. Standing in line wasn't bad because you got to watch all the other fools splash down and then freak as their bodies went into cold water shock. It helped me forget that in just a few minutes someone would be standing in line watching me.

Meredith, Randy, and I decided to take our chances while Cari stayed on dry ground with the baby. Here's the video of us heading down the slide:





Sliding was incredible fun! As soon as you splash into the water your body says, "GET OUT!", and once you get out, your brain says, "That was fun, go again!"

Meredith's brain must work a little differently, because she opted not to go again when the boy and I got back in line.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

More Babies!

I have been watching this bird nest in my rose tree for the past few weeks. Once I discovered, I had stopped caring for the tree because I didn't want to disturb the nest too much. That meant no pruning or spraying of any chemicals.

My hard work of neglect finaly paid off last week as I checked on the Mockingbird eggs and found two babies sitting in the nest! Cari and I kept the birds a secret from the kids because we were worried that they would disturb the nest and we didn't want momma bird to abandon them.

The babies didn't have their eyes open yet, so I'm guessing that they must have only been a few days. That fact made me a bit curious yesterday when I found the nest to be empty. They seemed awlfully young to have flown from the nest already.

Is it possible a predetor (neighbors cat) came and visited the nest in the night? Is it possible that they found a higher quality nest and moved away? Is it possible that they were quick learners and have flown on to start their own families?

I think I'm going to stick with the last theory and pretend there was a happy ending for the two babies. I just hope that next year, the momma makes her nest a little higher up rather than the stupid rose tree.

Monday, July 13, 2009

test video

test video blog from phone.

I got stuck at the tracks on my way home yesterday and captured this short video with my cell phone. I wanted to test if I could upload these short videos to the blog direct from the phone and it seems to work well. The audio is a lot quieter than it was on the phone, so if I did a video of me speaking, I question if it will be loud enough. Other than that, it looks like I will be able to upload quick videos more often.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Day Time Explorers

We packed a lunch and headed out to lake Issaqueena the other day. I had previously been out to this secluded spot alone and wanted to share it with the rest of my family.

When we arrived, there were a few cars in the lot and a few men standing around at one of the open-air buildings. This lake is very peaceful and beautiful but also creepy because you are so secluded. Only fifteen minutes from town, but off the beaten path. I wouldn't come out here at night.

We walked over to the dam and followed a trail around the shore of the lake for a few minutes. The kids talked about swimming, but the water didn't really look that great.

We got back in the car and on the way out, I followed a dirt road that looked to circle half of the lake and connect to civilization at the other end. We passed by several trail heads and picnic areas along the way. Some of these spots were ocupied but most were empty.

The GPS showed that we were getting close to our connection point but as I rounded the corner we came to a stream that crossed the road. I thought about plowing through it but Cari gave me a worried look. We stopped the car and got out to examine the road block.
The stream wasn't deep, but it was very rocky and rough on the bottom. I noticed a few larger boulders in the bottom and compared it to the ground clearance of my car. The explorer in me really wanted to try and make it, but with three kids in the back seat I didn't want to get stuck out here. With the car in reverse, I drove to the nearest picnic area to turn around.

Driving back, I kept thinking about how amazing this place looks and how there wasn't that many people around. It's a hidden treasure in the county. Some spots become popular hang outs and become more developed, but this lake has lasted decades as a lesser known. Most of the people I have seen out there are either on bike trails or on the waters edge fishing.

This is a great place to go and get away for a while, just don't go after dark.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Puzzle Me NOT

We finished our jigsaw puzzle! Even with a cat sleeping on the pieces each night, we were able to complete the 1,000 pieces without losing one. Now we are a bit hooked on puzzles. They can be found at Walmart or Target for ten to fifteen dollars.

Then I had the idea of creating my own puzzle. After a short search online, I found many places that offered to take one of my photos and convert it into a puzzle. The sites that would make large puzzles around 1,000 pieces wanted up to $90.

How is it that Walmart will sell a puzzle for $10 AND supply the art but when I use my own art it costs $90? I just got a business idea! My next Google search sent me to China where I found several puzzle cutting machines. For less than a thousand dollars I could start operations. Within fifteen sold puzzles, I will have made my money back on the machine.

I put together my business proposal and went to the boss for approval. Without even hearing my full idea she said no. She didn't even hear the whole plan! Maybe I shouldn't have started by asking to spend $1,000. Looking back, I now realize she tuned me out after my first sentence.

For now, we'll just be getting our puzzles at Walmart.

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

In the country with farmer Bill

Spending a day on the farm is more than just visiting with friends on a great summer day. Here are some of the other things you may encounter on the farm:

You may get to pet a week old calf.
Notice momma cow in the back watching us very closely.
You can talk to the chickens.
If you have a baby, then your baby can feed the chickens her pacifier and the chickens will run around the field fighting for it!
It may be hard to see, but the chicken in the front is holding a pink pacifier and RUNNING!
You can also go for rides on the 4-wheeler.

After all that, you can sit outside with friends until the sun goes down. As you can see, spending the day on the farm was awesome. Thanks again to our hosts, Bill and Jewell!

Monday, July 06, 2009

Church Signs

I have the opportunity to drive past several church signs on my way to and from work each day and seeing the messages they display to the community. It's not just a simple, "Worship at 11" sign. This is their chance to get someones attention.

After Christmas one church wrote, "Now open between Christmas and Easter."

This past week, for the 4th of July two neighboring churches posted similar quotes on their boards.

"The Bible is the cornerstone of liberty", Thomas Jefferson

"The Bible is the rock on which our Republic rests.", Andrew Jackson

It could be easy to drive by and not pay much attention to what those men were saying. But I had another twenty minutes of driving before I got home and I had some time to think about it.

Those two quotes added to the meaning of my holiday this weekend and I thought I'd share them with you this morning.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Family

Happy 4th of July!

One of our traditions on the 4th is to wear matching outfits from Old Navy. When I asked for everyone to take a family photo today they agreed as long as we didn't have to go outside into the burning heat.


I agreed and we took our photo on the couch.


I also had to agree that we would take a funny picutre as well.


Friday, July 03, 2009

Lights Out

When the Atheist and his (no longer) pregnant wife moved in next door they turned on the enormous, million candle light above their garage. The horrible thing about it is that they can't even see the light when the garage door is closed but the darn thing faces my house. A few times I tried to go out and get some photos in the garden during the evening but their light polluted my pictures.

This huge light is on a photocell, so it comes on every night at dark and shines in my windows until the sun comes up. At one point last year Cari asked me to fix our porch light but I reminded her that the Atheists light illuminates our entire yard. The only good thing I can say about crazy giant light is that I never have had to fix that porch light.

Over the past two years, the three million watt bulb they use has become a thorn in my side but I never complained to them. Only to my wife. I learned to adapt to the light mostly by wearing sunglasses when going outside in the evenings.

Two nights ago I came home from work and I couldn't see my porch steps. I looked up to the porch light and wondered why I hadn't ever fixed that thing. Then I turned my head toward the garage of the Atheist. It was dark, and that darkness brought a smile bigger than their light fixture across my face. I might have even let out a slightly audible scream of joy when I did my fist pump of victory.

You see, I realized at that moment, that the bulb had burned out. The Atheist and his wife (and child) have lived next to us for about two years now and if there is only one thing I have learned it is that they will never, EVER, replace that bulb.

Looks like I'll be fixing a porch light tonight.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

This is NOT for You!

On Tuesday I received an email from the corporate office. It was to notify me of yet another conference call that I am supposed to be on. I forwarded it to a peer that also has to be on the call and wrote a sarcastic line at the top. Something along the lines of, "Don't miss this call and then good luck getting the rest of your job done."

I clicked send and my eye caught the error. In the "To:" field I saw "Corporate Communications"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I didn't hit "forward", I had hit "reply". Instantly my mind tried to think of a way I could stop it from sending, but my sarcasm had already left the screen. There was no stopping the bits and bytes from telling the corporate office my opinion of their call. The worst case scenario rushed into my head and I felt very ill.

I am normally careful about things like this, but I was distracted for just a moment. I called my friend that should have gotten the email. My error brought him much joy as I heard him pounding a fist on his desk while laughing uncontrollably. He wasn't making me feel much better.

Over the next five minutes I checked my email ten times. The phone didn't ring and I didn't get any new messages. Sweat poured off of my head.

By the end of the day I had developed a logical story for my sarcasm (thanks to Cari) and I hadn't received any response back from corporate.

Crisis averted? I think so.